Control. Fixed Gaze on Jesus.
What a year this has been! We have faced so many hardships and uncertainties. I would have never imagined spending my senior year of college forced to do all online classes or having a mask as a mandatory accessory. I would have never thought we would run out of toilet paper and water at our local grocery stores and be forced to stay inside of our homes for days that turned into weeks, that turned into months on end. I realized that one thing that all this uncertainty easily brought to my life was fear, and anxiety. Often, I would let myself get so overwhelmed by the fear of a pandemic and what was going to happen that I would let it almost control my life…but THANK GOD that he is ALWAYS in control.
This year has really reminded me that we as a society, we as a nation, and we as the human race ARE NOT and NEVER will be in control. God still reigns and he knew that the COVID-19 pandemic would happen, in fact it is part of HIS plan for the kingdom. Throughout these recent months of going through my own silent and personal struggles of anxiety, fear, and unpredictability I cannot help but be reminded of the story of Jesus walking on water. In Matthew book 14 we see a few miracles take place. The first miracle that Matthew talks about is when Jesus feeds the 5 thousand with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish, but the second miracle that takes place is a beautiful reminder of how God is always in control. After Jesus feeds the 5 thousand, he went to pray alone on a mountain, and told the disciples to get into a boat before him and go to the other side of the Sea of Galilee. There was a storm that overcame the boat, and the boat was uncontrollably getting beaten by the waves and the wind, when the disciples looked over, they saw Jesus walking on water! They were immediately afraid and thought it was a ghost! But Jesus said “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.” (Matt 14:27). This verse in particular stopped me in my tracks. Like WOW! Jesus is reminding us to NOT be afraid. He IS the king over the world! He created the world. He created us, so why would we be afraid, if the King of the world is on our side as a friend to us through it all? We need to remember that even though we are being dragged down by the temporary “normal” whether it is virtualized school, work, or be in quarantine that we must take heart. Jesus is there beside us and knows what he is doing, we should never be afraid of what is to come, for he is in control.
After Jesus told his disciples to take heart and not be afraid Peter answered him and said, “Lord if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” And Jesus answered “Come.” So, peter got out of the boat and walked towards Jesus. But Peter got overwhelmed when he saw the wind, and became afraid, and started to sink. He cried out “Lord, save me.” Jesus reached out his hand and took ahold of him saying, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” (Matt 14:28-31). Just take a second to reflect…How many times this year did we take our eyes off Jesus and began to sink into the water? How many times did we doubt that Jesus was really in control? Personally, this story has been on my heart the past few months. I have recently had moments where I took my eyes off Jesus and began to sink, and I tried to get above the waves, but they were too big for me to handle on my own. I doubted that Jesus was really in control of this pandemic and it made my faith become shaken. I doubted Him. But even still God is so good. Even in doubt God shows grace.
Take a min to look up at the stars at night. Take time to look at each individual twinkle and shape they make. Think about how incredible it is that the same God who made each of those stars individually, in all their beauty, is the same God who took time to create you. He created every strand of hair on your head, He took time to create the exact unique shape and color of your eyes. If a God can take the time to create the stars, and create the beautiful small details about you then why should we doubt him? Take heart and remember that Jesus is in control. He is in control of what happens today, He is in control of happens tomorrow, He is in control of what happens within the next few months, he is in control of what happens in the next few years and yes He is even in control in the midst of a global pandemic.
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